1. You’ve been at the bus stop for 20 minutes, and you’re running late for an important meeting. The bus arrives, but it passes your stop. No, you’re not invisible; Muni is in fact playing a cruel trick on you.
2. A baby starts crying on the bus. Really, really crying. Not even wearing headphones set at the highest volume will mask the screeching.
3. You run five blocks to catch the bus that’s at the stop. The door shuts right as you get there. You bear the pain of a twisted ankle and the awkward stares of the lucky Muni passengers who made it on board.
4. You’re running late for a job interview, and the Muni driver kicks you off with the only explanation that the bus is now “out of service.” Now you’re out of luck. And you probably didn’t get the job.
5. The bus breaks at a halting stop, and you spill coffee on yourself. You’re wearing a ruined outfit before 9 a.m., and you’re scarily un-caffeinated. (Hopefully, this doesn’t happen on a Monday.)
6. The bus arrives, and it’s PACKED. You silently fight with strangers to make your way on like the last, cozy puzzle piece. You win, but this victory tastes like dirty looks, sharp elbows, and swinging backpacks.
7. A woman is talking on her phone. Correction, yelling to her friend about this Tinder date she went on. Now the entire bus has a bio of her love life, and you resent Muni for both annoying you and reminding you how single you are.
8. You’re rocking a big jacket and a scarf to keep yourself warm while waiting at the bus stop. Then you get on a crowded bus, and the sea of bodies changes the temperature drastically. You get off the bus drenched in sweat.
9. A stranger taps you on your shoulder. Your headphones are in, but said stranger has immediately ignored the social cue that you want to be left alone. They keep asking you questions, and for the rest of your 30-minute ride, you’re trapped in an uncomfortable and unwanted conversation. Not to mention that they hop off at the same stop as you!
10. You bravely take your grip off the handrails for 30 seconds, presuming you can keep your balance. You fall. Hard. And now you need to contemplate taking lessons in Muni Surfing 101.
11. You get off the bus and realize you have a mystery stain on your jeans. Not knowing what’s on your jeans is troubling, but maybe it would be even worse if you knew what it was.
12. You’re in the back, trying to get off a crowded bus. You yell, “Back door!” anxiously to the driver, but no one moves out of your way, the doors shut, and the bus starts to take off. Everyone’s still silently staring at you as you tug the bell for the next stop.